News In Brief

Fashion News:
Short-sleeve-shirt-wearing American Terry Henshall was today told for the 43rd time this week that he must be cold. “I appreciate their concern, but even though we were indoors, I had just taken off my Canada Goose jacket, and the fact that the girl who was talking to me was wearing a skirt that resembled a particularly anaemic belt didn’t seem to strike her as strange.”

Education News:
Malorie Conway is the latest ALT to be frustrated by the lack of respect she receives from her Japanese co-workers. “I don’t understand it. I’ve taken an online TEFL course, I’ve been doing the job for six months, yet still they don’t take me seriously. It’s probably jealousy. Or racism,” Conway told The Daily Nag.“Malorie is a great teacher, and the kids love her,” said Kana Nagata, Principal at Conway’s school. “But she continues to use the Comic Sans font on her worksheets, and surely no one can respect that.”

Nature News:
As temperatures continue to drop, scientists are concerned for Japan’s cicada population. “The Japanese summer was filled with the sounds of cicada chirruping through the night,” said Professor Taishi Fujita, Head of Insect Studies at University of Nagoya. “But now you hardly ever hear them. Our extensive research leads us to presume that they all committed mass suicide at around November. Perhaps in protest at the first anniversary of Trump’s election, but of the facts surrounding it we can’t be sure. Perhaps fittingly.”

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