Star Wars: The Force Awakens
Starts Dec. 18
Obviously the movie every nerd is waiting to see this month is Star Wars episode… I dunno 7? Or is it really 4 if you don’ count the Jar Jar Binks infested prequels? Whatever. Anyway spoiler alert – by that I mean you are going to have to stop using all social media until you see this thing, cause you know someone out there on the internets is gonna blab all about it before you get a chance to see it.
Prediction: Luke goes over to the dark side. I mean – you just know this is gonna happen right?
Peanuts The Movie
Starts Dec. 4
If you loved watching all those heart warming cartoons from the 70’s you are going to hate the fluffy animation of the newly re-booted version of Peanuts. Besides being written totally from scratch by someone who is not Charles Schultz, Charlie Brown is played by someone who has not been convicted of trying to assassinate a San Diego sheriff two years after confessing to stalking his ex-lover and the plastic surgeon who gave her a breast augmentation.
Prediction: Peppermint Patty has gone over to the dark side.
Daniel Craig may or may not be starring for the last time as Bond, James Bond. But it doesn’t matter. The recent Bond movies are barely distinguishable from a warmed over Mission Impossible vehicle. However I will give Spectre kudos for actually wrecking millions of dollars worth of cars. Fuck that CGI crap. Sadly however, is there any need for actual spies these days?
Prediction: Craig strikes out with Peppermint Patty