Gaijin’s girlfriend to be disappointed by love hotel Christmas gift

The girlfriend of a Nagoya-based gaijin is set to be extremely disappointed by the ‘treat’ planned by her gaijin boyfriend for Christmas this year.

Mai Nishida has been getting her hopes up incredibly high about the impending festive season since she began dating American Simon Poulter in October.

“Since I was a little child I have loved the idea of the American Christmas: the family gatherings, the tree, the cake, and most of all the presents,” Nishida said whilst wearing a reindeer sweater that could only be described as ‘festive’. “However, having dated only Japanese men in the past, the closest I have been to a proper Christmas was when one boyfriend took me to KFC. It wasn’t as magical as it sounds.

“But now that I’m with Simon I can’t wait to celebrate a proper Christmas. It’s going to be great!”

However Nishida is destined to be disappointed as Poulter has no intention of bestowing upon her the Christmas she so desperately craves.

“I’m so happy to be dating a Japanese girl at Christmas time,” said Poulter, a 27 year-old kindergarten teacher celebrating his first Christmas in Japan. “In the past I have had to spend a fortune on extravagant gifts: Jewellery, iPhones, expensive shoes. But as I am with a Japanese girl she won’t be expecting anything. In fact, a mutual friend of ours told me that Japanese girls just want to go to love hotels on Christmas and bang for hours on end, so I have booked a room at a seedy place in Shinsakae. It’s going to be great!”

The mutual friend Peter Hunterson, 29, from Ireland however, seems to be aware of the disparity between the couple’s expectations.

“For the last couple of years Mai has complained to me that her Japanese boyfriends have shown her a crap time at Christmas, and as I am desperately in love with her, I have repeatedly told her how well westerners treat girls at Christmas in the hope that she would go out with me,” Hunterson explained.

“So obviously I was gutted when she started going out with Simon. But thankfully he didn’t need much persuading that she would just want to go to some cesspit of a love hotel as a Christmas treat.”

“It’s going to be a total disaster, and with any luck she’ll come running straight into my arms,” he added. “It’s going to be great!”

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