Ask Kazuhide – June, 2012

Dear Kazuhide,

Why almost of Japanese men has bad breath? Cute Cute

Dear Cute Cute,

Takuan. Rots and rots of takuan.

Dear Kazuhide,

I have two queries regarding emergency services. 1: The Japanese Police. When they are driving police cars they happily leave their flashing lights on 90% of the time, even though their is no emergency! They have followed me with their lights flashing for a while, but not pulled me over. Have you heard of the “boy who cried wolf” story? Teach that to the police! 2:Ambulances. They drive slower than my grandma! I have even seen them turn their lights/sirens off driving back to a hospital if they don’t think they can get through the traffic at a busy red light!

Enrighten me! Cheers,


Dear Jos,

Japanese police is same as American police. They got the power so they want to drive anywhere they want nice speed. Also, they don’t make sound, so you should pulling over dumb ass! Japanese is different order respect the human. It is impolite to rush, so they is giving more time and casual to the living person. Dying person almost gone from earth and usually old, so they are patient and taking the time anyway. Also rushing the old woman in ambulance might giving her the heart attack!


Why is it that every time someone writes in you think they are American? Do you have an open dislike for the USA? If it weren’t for the war and the US letting the Japanese companies into the US with few restrictions (Unlike Japan) then Japan wouldn’t be where it is today, it would be more like Vietnam or the Philippines,  plus all the technology the Japanese companies stole from the US companies during those so-called partnerships. I think every Japanese person when seeing an American should stop and give them a nice deep bow!

Rob A

Rob A,

I trace your computer IP address. My friend at the VISA office say your ‘humanities’ visa is expire today. Have a nice trip home!

Dear Kazuhide,

Perhaps you can shed some light on this mystery for me. It seems that whenever I find something I really like at a convenience store, they stop selling it. Why do products come and go so fast in Japan?

Will Fisher

Dear Will and Grace,

Basically all conbini has security video camera right? In America this is to catch black criminals who wear pantyhose. However, in Japan, these camera is for making private company database of which food is picked by customer. Marketing study. If gaijin is eating some foods, they will discontinue because it must be too unhealthy or making everyone fat.

Dear Kazuhide,

Why is it that people can’t walk in this country? It should be obvious that when you are walking down a crowded street, that you should look where you are going. The countless times I have been bumped into or have seen people running into bikes is ridiculous. Don’t even get me started on the people who just decide to stop walking and stand in the middle of a busy shopping arcade. It would be great if you could shed some light on this subject for me? Your devoted reader.


Dear Sam,

Welcome to Japan. We have large population in small area of land. Congraturation you notice this. Very smart, very intelligent man.

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